History of me being a fat girl.
I have a stocky build. My wedding rings are a size 8 *even though they're loose now*. My class ring from high school is a 9. I don't do shoulder pads because they just make me look even more 'stiff' through the shoulders (meaning my shoulders are broad to begin with). I am and have always been tall. I am at about 5' 10". I have never in the past nor will I in the future wear a size 0. Let's just say, I'm a solid girl.
The teasing began in 6th grade. I think the boys were irritated because I was taller than them and other things changed for me during that time. *If you happen to be reading this and you went to school with me, I don't hold any ill feelings toward any of you, it has truly shaped me into who I am today.* The teasing lessened as we entered junior high because we were at the high school and too busy learning how to juggle getting to our locker and our next class in the allotted time. By the time I reached high school, the teasing became more unbearable, but the teasers were more subtle. As I look back at that time, I was far from fat, but I certainly was made to feel that way *even if they never intended for me to feel that way* and that was the body image that I 'adopted.'
This was me as a senior in high school My boyfriend and I were crowned homecoming king and queen. Go figure! In some ways I thought they only chose us because they wanted to tease me more. Weird, right?
When we got married, I was somewhere around 200, after working at getting back to my skinny self again.
This picture was taken in May of 2001. We got married in December. I probably weighed about 180ish here and to me, I look a bit too skinny if that's even possible.
After we got married, life was difficult. I ate to self soothe. Marriage wasn't much of what I had expected it to be. Just before Mother's Day of 2002, I found out I was pregnant with our oldest. By the time I had her, I easily weighed close to 300 if not more *I stopped looking at the scale when the nurse weighed me at the doctor's office.*
It has been an up and down roller coaster ride ever since. I've had to put a stop to the emotional eater. I've had to find ways to help myself cope during times of stress. I am still in this journey.
So with that said, and my post being much longer than I had intended, my brain has still not completely caught up with my weight loss. Even though this journey has already taken me over a year, I am still a work in progress. I am still learning. Maybe at some point my brain will catch up with the rest of me and I'll remove that part. Until then, you all are stuck with it.