Stress

If you know me *and even if you don't* you would know that I love my children.  A lot.  Right now, they are ages 9, 5, and 2.  My 9 year old is for the most part, obedient and compliant.  My middle kiddo, while you could say she has 'middle child syndrome', there's more to it than that, but suffice it to say, she pushes the envelope on e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g.  My 2 year old is, well, two; she gets into everything and is very impish.

Where am I going with this.  Well, my middle kiddo stresses me out.  A lot.  She is the sweetest child in all seriousness.  She is in all honesty, strong willed and difficult.  I made a taco 'casserole' for dinner tonight.  She is not terribly fond of tacos in general.  But, I thought this particular dish would be a winner for sure.  Not so much.  When she saw me fixing it, she said, "Ewww gross!"  Then she came in for dinner, smelled it, and said, "It smells delicious."  She starts eating, "I hate this dinner!"  A couple of bites in, she wants a drink.  We don't allow drinks until after the main part of the meal is eaten.  She is given two choices.  She doesn't like either one and begins crying/throwing herself.  She is taken to her room.  She comes out.  It's more of the same...choices...doesn't like choices...fit throwing...room.  You get the idea.

My personality definitely clashes with that of my 5 year old.  And while some parents might be able to just let it roll, when you deal with this type of behavior day in and day out, it's exhausting and draining.  My go to comfort?  Food.  I'm just not sure how to stop the cycle.  My sweet hubby's personality is so much more capable in dealing with her personality than mine is.  And, while there is a name for what I'm dealing with in my 5 year old, I'm not so sure 'mom' is accurate for me sometimes.  Something more along the lines of 'crazy', 'nuts' or 'out of my mind' might be more accurate.

I guess one of the first steps in breaking the cycle is recognizing it.  So far, I've done that.  I now need to find something constructive to do instead of eating.