Friday, December 30, 2011

So it all began...

One year, 2 months, and 29 days ago, I embarked on yet another journey to find my skinny self again.  The date?  October 1st, 2010.  Just days earlier, I'd had my birthday.  My 33rd birthday.  It wasn't a milestone, but I felt sad and depressed in a body that wasn't truly who I wanted to be.  I made the decision that I'd start back on Weight Watchers beginning on October 1st.

I made my hubby aware of what I had planned.  I told him that I was going to use birthday money to get me started.  I also made up my mind that I would never go back.  I couldn't.  This had to be it.  I had to accept the good, the bad and the ugly.  And, it was ugly.

If I go back through pictures from last year, I avoided being in front of the camera, rather I was behind it, taking pictures of my girls.  I didn't like what I saw.

First weigh-in...292.  Yes, you read that right.  Two hundred ninety-two pounds.  The bad?  I was looking at 107 pounds that I wanted to lose.  The good?  I had Weight Watchers at my disposal.  WW is old hat to me because I've done it before.  I'd lost 100 pounds on WW before.  I'd made it to goal in 2005.  Why did I let myself go in the first place?  I love food.  Food is comfort.  Food 'loved' me when I felt like no one else did.  So I put it all back on.

I had a baby in 2007.  I lost some weight after she was born.  I had another baby in 2010.

So there it is.

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