A Test Of Willpower

So you don't think you have any willpower?  Well let me tell you, it's something that has to be grown.  At some point or another, you lose all sense of it completely.  Then one day, your kid hands you a cookie.  You take the cookie in your hand, you raise the cookie to your mouth, and you start to stick it *absentmindedly* into your mouth...as in it's enough in your mouth that you've had a 'taste', but you STOP!  You politely hand it back to you child and say thank you.  You also tell her that you appreciate the offer, but that you're trying to be good.

Thankfully in the above instance, it was my 11 year old and not my 4 year old, because I might not have had enough willpower to withstand those cute little blue eyes.

Or willpower may be sitting down with a classroom full of preschoolers and only eating half of the whole wheat roll that came with lunch, instead of the whole thing.  Or saying no to the pancake and eating the fruit during snack time.

Willpower may look completely different to you.  Maybe it's only taking one scoop of something when you normally take two.

Start small here friends.  I am.  I need to find it again.  I need it for me.  My waistline needs it too.

Be patient friends.  And hang in there!

14 for '14

Well, I am officially 2 months behind.  I have made zero goals for myself this year.  Why?  I'm not really sure, but some of the reasons could be:  I didn't want to face the truth about where I am physically, I have a lot on my plate, I'm working, life is crazy, taking care of 3 children and the house, did I mention...life is crazy??

With that said...my '14 for '14

1. Find the joy in me.
2. Calm the crazy.
3. Become the independent woman I know that I can be.
4. Start running...again.  Gosh I miss it!  Who would ever have thought those words would cross my lips???
5. Find time to do things that I enjoy.  This is hard for me because every time I have the time, something comes up that requires immediate attention.
6. Hike more.  I have a new hiking buddy and I just bought me some hiking boots.  I'm giddy about getting out there and not worrying about my sneakers being plastered in mud or sinking into mud up to my ankles  :)
7. Find more ways to be frugal.  I thought I was frugal before, but I need new ideas.  Things that I already do include:  homemade dishwasher soap, homemade laundry soap, bake my own bread, hang my clothes outside to dry, base my meals on sales, shop at Savers & Goodwill, uh...the list could go on, but my brain is drawing a blank.  You get the idea though.
8. Be passionate about life.
9. Love deeply.
10. Encourage my girls to enjoy life to the fullest.
11. Drop 1 clothes size.  Let's not be too zealous.
12. Be patient with myself when things don't seem to be going the way I want them to be.
13. Take pictures.  Lots of them.
14. Be a good friend and encouragement to others.

Fairly good list I think.   So, I'm pretending that it's January 1st...and...I'm off!  Let's do this thing!

Starting Again

If you have never been on the journey before or if you're starting again *for the millionth time*, you know how the first few days and weeks can be.  You have to dig in deep and find that inner 'will' that can carry you on to the next day or week.

I have to say, the first day wasn't terrible.  The difference between this go at it and the last is that I am now working.  I can't say that working is anything new because I've worked and shed the pounds before.  The difference this time is that I sit down and eat lunch my kids and then sit down and have snack with them.  Mind you, I'm taking the portion size of a preschooler, but I'm still eating things that I don't typically eat at home.  For instance, a bean and cheese burrito.  Again, not an adult size and not something you'd pick up from say, Taco Bell, but...it's not something I would choose to eat on a regular basis.  And, for as balanced as they say it is, it often doesn't fit my definition of balanced.

Day 2 is going to be spent home with my baby.   Rather than chasing kids around on the playground, I'll be chasing dust bunnies.

As with all things, I need to be patient with myself.  Each day is a new day.  I need to be happy with me and find the peace that moves me from day to day.

One Year

It's officially been a year since I started running.  There are a lot of things that I have learned.

My top 10 things I've learned about running this past year:

1. It doesn't matter how fast you are, it matters that you've gotten your butt out the door.
2. Give yourself something to work towards...a goal.
3. Make your goal attainable.
4. For goodness sakes...breathe.  After doing my half marathon, my silly breathing technique didn't seem so silly to me.  I could hear people coming up behind me that were breathing in ways that seemed silly, but I'm sure worked for them.  I might have thought a couple people were dying in need of a water break, but they kept running.
5. If people pass you, who cares?  Who am I kidding?  I care!  Yes, it pained me to have people pass me, especially people who were older than me, but I had to remind myself that I was in it for me.  Maybe at some point in their lives, they started out like me.  Or maybe, they never experienced starting this running business in their mid 30s, so they have no idea where I've come from.  Either way, finishing, no matter how I got there, was #1.
6. Find your happy place.  This may include a nice trail where you live.  It may include music.  For me, it's a little of both sometimes.  For my half, I started out with music and at some point *probably around the half way point* I went unplugged.  It was a great decision.
7. Be comfortable.  Isn't that the same as your happy place?  Nope.  You need to make sure that you have good fitting sneakers, you're wearing clothes that keep you cool *or in the winter...warm!*, and clothes that are easy to run/breathe in.  If you're uncomfortable while you're running, it will be miserable.
8. Don't be afraid of the elements.  Okay, well if there is extreme weather, then be afraid of the elements.  But, if it's snowy or rainy...give it a go.  Weather conditions won't always be perfect and if you allow them to get in the way, then you're giving yourself an excuse to not go out the door.
9. If something seems hard, it may very well be.  Try it again.  Which leads me to #10...
10. Don't give up!  Just because it's hard, doesn't mean that you should give up on it.  Keep working on it and you'll get your groove!

One last thought on this whole running business...have fun!  If nothing else, be able to laugh at yourself.  If you fall...pick yourself back up, dust yourself off and keep going *unless you're seriously injured!!!*  Life is too short to live wondering if you could have done a 5k.  No one can ever fault you for getting out there and making you a healthier you!

Valentine's Day--Be Kind To Yourself!

I *semi-recently* talked about saving yourself.  This post will piggy back that one.  Now that we're approaching Valentine's Day, I want you not to think about the chocolates that abound during this time of year *especially as we approach Easter*.  Did I mention that I saw Cadbury eggs at the grocery store when I went shopping last week?  Sheesh!  I digress.

Let's think of some things that will show that you love yourself *again...don't go thinking that I'm talking about being self-absorbed or selfish*.

Here we go...a list of things to show that you love yourself:

1. Eating healthy food options.
2. Eat proper food portions of said healthy food options *even healthy food can be 'abused.'*
3. Move your buns in a fashion that will cause your heart rate to be raised in such a way that you might expend some calories.
4. Drink plenty of water.
5. Get plenty of rest *aka sleep*.
6. Pamper yourself from time to time *this is more for the ladies...give yourself a pedicure or have one done; manicure; hair cut; take a hot bubble bath w/ candles lit in a safe manner; a new outfit to show off the evidence of loving yourself through #1-5.*
7. Don't deprive yourself of a little something from time to time (ie: *a* piece of chocolate, but if it will cause you to stumble, don't try it yet)
8. Spend some time doing something you enjoy.  Maybe you enjoy crocheting, reading a good book, crafting, or baking.  Make sure it's something you enjoy.

What are some ways that you can 'love' yourself?  *I probably could also say 'be kind to yourself.'*  

Life Saver

I had this odd thought as I was out walking today.  I passed our fire station here in town *or at least one of them* and it hit me!  The people who work at that fire station save lives, land, homes, etc.  And no, that's not what hit me.

If you have children and if they were in a life threatening situation, would you do everything in your power to save them?

If you don't have children, but you do have pets and they were in a life threatening situation, would you do everything in your power to save them?

Okay, so you don't have children or a pet, but you have a husband/wife/significant other, sister, brother, cousin, aunt, uncle...or something of great value...that was is in a dire situation, would you do everything in your power to save them/it?

Where am I going with this?

Firefighters, paramedics, doctors, EMTs, nurses, police officers, you and me...we're all in the business of saving lives.

How is this possible you may ask?  I don't have the proper training.  Oh, but you do!

You need to be about the business of saving your own life and maybe a few others along the way.  What I mean is that you are responsible for changing your food modification, getting out and exercising moving your backside, and doing what you need to do to make you a healthier you.  If you don't change these things now, you aren't the life saver that you are meant to be.

And what is that expression they say on a flight?  If there is a loss in cabin pressure, put your mask on first and then assist others.  You need to help yourself first, get yourself healthy, and then help others.  You definitely need to reach out to others for their support in your journey, but don't lose sight of who you need to help first.

Yourself.**



**Note:  I'm not saying that you should be selfish or self absorbed, but focus on the baby steps you need to take to make you a healthier you.

My Heart's Desire

I may get a little soap box-ish, so if you're afraid...walk away now.

Seriously.

My Monday morning study is reading a new book.  We're only 3 chapters in, but I know that it is speaking to me.  I know that the author is my voice in some ways too.  The book is called Winning the Food Fight and it's written by Steve Willis.  Again, I don't receive any money by talking about his book nor am I looking for anything in doing so.

When I started writing this blog, I felt the desire to help people, to reach people who don't necessarily live near me.  I couldn't put my finger on the full reason as to why I felt compelled to start this.  Steve says in Winning the Food Fight, "You feel a righteous indignation that is compelled by love.  You have to do something.  You may not be sure what, but by God's grace, you will act." (p. 58)

Ding, ding, ding!  That's it exactly!!

And, in case you thought I am being all 'righteous'...I'm not.  It's righteous indignation, which is:   retribution, retributive justice; anger and contempt combined with a feeling that it is one's right to feel that way; anger without guilt (according to dictionary.com).  To me, it's more about frustration that is compelled by love.

I'm frustrated because I can't help more than I am.  I'm frustrated because I can lead a horse to water, but I can't force it to drink.

I can't proclaim that I know everything there is to know about weight loss.  I've said it before, but it is worth repeating...what works/has worked for me, won't always necessarily work for you *or someone else.*  What it comes down to is you finding what works best for you.  Do I sound a bit like a broken record?  Good!

You will never know if you can succeed, unless you try.  Again, Steve says, "...defeat in the mind usually precedes defeat in the body.  If we are going to change our diet* and exercise habits, we must first be convinced in our hearts and minds that we need to change."  Winning the Food Fight, (p. 55)

That little * by diet is my own doing.  The word diet is just wrong.  So rather than saying diet, let's say food modification or food alteration.  Really what we need to be doing is modifying how we're eating now.  Right?  Baby steps here people.  I'm not saying you need to overhaul your complete menu...just tweak it a little.

And, backing up a little to the last part of that quote.  It's what I said a couple of posts ago, your mind and heart need to be in it in order to succeed.  Truly.  There's no other way to do it.

I'm anxious to see what more I learn.  Steve says that if I have an itch to help, that I just need to keep reading.

Happy New Year!

It's a new year!  It's 2013!!  We're now 19ish hours in and it has been a pretty great day.  Why do I say that it was a pretty great day?  I made some tasty things for us to eat for breakfast.  I made a beautiful loaf of 100% whole wheat bread *with fresh milled flour*. 

The most important thing I did today *aside from taking care of my children and keeping my house in order*?  My friend and I completed the Commitment Day 5k.  Now, we don't live anywhere near the large cities that were listed on the main page, but we decided to give it a go here.  We were hoping for a few other folks, but it was just she and I.  We ran her route about a week ago and it was a bit difficult.  Today, we ran it and it felt so great that I suggested that we keep going.  She called me a brat.  True story.  But, she suggested that we take 'another loop'.  And...we did!  And...it was awesome!  And...I sprinted at the end.  Yep...me!!

Our pace was slower today, but we pulled in 4.96 miles *let's just say a nice even 5*.  Of course, that included a 5 minute warm up and 4 minutes of a cool down.  There is something else that was great.  I usually take a day off in-between my runs, but I didn't want to abandon my day yesterday in part because it was my 20th day for a challenge that I was a part of.  Regardless of my two days in a row, I don't feel overly spent.  I'm not sure how my friend feels not that she's had some down time.

So here it is, the evening of the 1st and I'm feeling excited about the month...and the year.  We have two birthdays coming up this month.  One, I'm not allowing to happen *completely teasing our daughter about this.*  I've told her she's not allowed to turn double digits.  With that in mind, I am looking forward to making their cakes and celebrating their lives!

Get moving friends!  It's a new year and time to make your goals a reality!

13 for '13

Here it is!!  The long awaited 13 for '13.  That's 13 goals for 2013.  If you're not sure why I don't dig resolutions, you can check out my last post here.  I reviewed the goals that I made for 2012.  I'm looking forward to a new year.  I think it'll be a year of continuing to strengthen my body and renew my mind.

Without further ado, my 13 for '13:

1. Continue to maintain my goal weight.  And, I need to give myself a 5 pound buffer even though it pains me to say so...I need that.  It's more about being up 5 pounds rather than down 5.
2. I want to keep running...to remain dedicated no matter what!  It's hard, but I enjoy it far more than I ever thought I would.
3. I want to spend time with my hubby at night at least once a week *I guess I should clue him in on this too, huh?*  I just bought Battleship *the game* for he and I to play.  We've also played Othello recently.  This is an adjustment over this year's goal of going on a date night 1x per month.
4. Take time for myself.  I really need to continue to do this for myself.  I need to be vocal about it too.  I'm hoping that I can do this once every other week or so.  Hoping to.
5. Spend less time on the computer.  I typically spend some time on the computer in the morning while I drink my coffee/tea; some time while I eat lunch and then again after dinner.  The goal?  I need to limit it a bit more.  I'm going to set the timer and spend no more than a half hour in the morning and at lunch.  Then I can spend a bit more time on the computer after the girls go to bed.
6. Do more crafty things with my girls.  I did quite a few things with them just before Christmas and I'd like to keep doing fun things with them.  They loved it!
7. Bake more with the girls.  They enjoy the baked goods that I make, so I'd like them to help more in the kitchen.
8. Write one letter/card by hand a month.  I am modifying this one from this year as well.  A handwritten note can make someone's day so much better.  Have you tried it recently? *no I don't mean a personal e-mail either!!*
9. Continue taking my girls outside to do things like sledding, bike riding, and walking.  I have a blast too.  We've gone sledding several times already.  We just love it!
10. Express my feelings better with my friends, husband and girls.  *A repeat from this year.*
11. Read at least 3 books this next year.  I enjoy it...I need to do it for myself.  I need to make time for it.
12. Encourage others who are continuing their journey or starting a new journey.  It's a hard road, but one that is worth it!
13. Laugh at myself, laugh at my children and roll my eyes at my husband *another adjustment from one for this year.*

Do you have some new goals for this year?  What do you want to work on?

No giving up!  It's not allowed!

And...HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!  I hope and pray that you all have a very blessed and happy year in 2013!

One Last Review

So nearly a year ago I wrote this blog post called 12 for '12.  You can find that here.  I'm going to also list them here in a minute too.  If you're new to my blog, I came up with goals instead of resolutions because, well...I feel like we make resolutions and then they get broken.  I feel like goals are attainable, achievable, and most importantly...believable!

So, my 12 for '12 were the following *I will add in my thoughts next to them in parenthesis*:

1. Get to my goal weight *185* or less and maintain it.  (I've fluctuated off and on throughout the last 10 months since attaining goal.  I have not gained 10 pounds or anything, but I've been up about 4 pounds.  In all, I feel pretty good about the last 10 months.  It will always be a struggle, but I know that now.)
2. Continue to work hard by strengthening my body.  (Boy have I been doing this!  Not only have I been strengthening my body, but pushing it too.  I never thought that I'd still be running, but I am and this morning was awesome!)
3. Try to have at least one 'date' with my hubby per month *coffee date, dinner date, something!*  (Hmm, well, we did pretty good with this until summer hit and it all went down hill thereafter.  Our last date night was in August.  However, we did sit and play a couple of games of Othello last night after the littler two went to bed.  It was a lot of fun and we plan to play Battleship together tonight!)
4. Keep trying new recipes.  (I do this a lot naturally anyway.  We've found some new ones that we love and some that are just 'eh.'  Since it has gotten cold, I've found that I'm choosing our 'old' favorites in regards to comfort food.)
5. Read more.  (This has waxed and waned quite a bit this year.  I'm still reading a particular book that I really need to finish.  I find myself busy doing so many other things.  Today, the girls and I went sledding!)
6. Take time for myself *outside of exercise & my book study*.  (This has been difficult too, but I'm learning to tell my husband that I *need* time for myself.  And I truly *need* this time for myself.)
7. Continue to blog and share my journey with others.  (I don't blog as much as I would like, but I still feel like I'm sharing my heart with others when I can and that is the important part.)
8. Do things with the girls that require going outside and being active.  (We have done quite a bit of this in the last couple of months *especially*.  When my hubby was away, I still wanted to get my runs in so the oldest pulled the youngest in the bike trailer behind her bike, and middle kiddo road her bike.  Going sledding is another activity that we've down now 3 times with other opportunities to do so again.  We've also gone on bike rides a lot too or just for walks.)
9. Eat fresh fruits/veggies as much as possible.  (I'm still doing quite a bit of fresh.  I would say that more than 50% of my veggie/fruit intake is fresh, but the rest is frozen.)
10. Write more letters by hand.  (I've done fairly well with this.  I still have room for improvement on it though.  It's just so convenient to sit down and write an e-mail.)
11. Laugh more.  (I'd say look at #8...we did a whole lot of laughing as we were coming down the hill today.  Also, playing games with hubby or kiddos...also lends to laughing.)
12. Learn how to better express my feelings to others.  (Oh boy...this is still hard.  I'm getting better.  It's improving, but I will be adding it on for next year too).

Overall, I feel like I've done pretty well on my goals for this year.  As we get ready for 2013, I will be adding a couple of these onto my new goals list.  In some ways, there's no reason to reinvent the wheel.  I have a few more days, but will be formulating my new goals list.

 

What will your goals for 2013 be?  Don't give up!  Just keep on keeping on!

And if you're curious to see my other goal reviews you can see them here, and here.

500 Miles

It has happened!  Wednesday as I ran in 20-some degree weather and the sun was setting, I hit my first 500 miles.  In my defense, I only had .2 miles to go before hitting that after my run on Monday.  I have to say that the weather has been less than desirable the past eight or nine days.  It started getting yucky last Wednesday with the higher winds and colder temperatures.  Then Thursday, Friday, and Saturday...we got snow.  We got quite a bit too.

I did in fact run on Saturday after all of our snow.  It was nicely packed on the streets which made using my hubby's Yaktrax a cinch.  Here's the sad tale of my hubby's Yaktrax.  I bought them for him a couple of years ago for Christmas.  They've sat in his drawer since then.  I'm not sure if he's just not a die-hard like me or what the deal is.  I know that he's had a membership to the gym, so that may have also played a part in it too.  He also didn't have much of a chance to use them last year due to the lack of adequate snow fall.  I digress.  When I got ready to go for my run, I told him that I was going to use them.  I'll give those babies a test run.  And...I did!  Amazing!  I didn't fall, nor did I slip on the ice.  I had two older gentlemen tell me to be careful on the ice, but I informed them that I had my Yaktrax on.  This is what I had on.

I don't intend on giving up my running unless something unforeseen occurs.  I also don't know how our weather will be.  When I ran on Monday, I ran the Route 66 loop since I knew that downtown would be clear for tourists, etc.  If you do the entire loop, it's 2 miles.  I did it twice!  I even got a shout out from my friend's boss, who happens to co-own the pizzeria downtown.  She told me that I am sure dedicated.  I think I'm crazy most of the time...not so much dedicated.

The other thing I've started trying to do is get myself active for a period of time every hour.  I have two pieces of music that walk to in the house and together they last about 7-8 minutes.  I've even done a dance party with the girls during that time.  I do set the time for 60 minutes.  When it goes off, I get up and get going.  It helps on my otherwise quiet days.  I know it doesn't seem possible to have 'quiet' days when you have a house full of girls, but I mean that we don't have a lot of activity happening.  It's not only good for me, but it's also good for the girls.  And...they enjoy it!

We are approaching Christmas and I hope that you have a blessed and special time with your family!  I'm not going to tell you to deprive yourself...all things in moderation!!

500 Mile Challenge

I'm still plugging away on my 500 mile challenge.  Today, I broke into my last 100 miles!  It is truly exciting and I never thought that I would log in that many miles, but it has become a reality.  I just completed week 11 of the Couch to 10K program and was totally in a zone this morning.  I woke up startled this morning at 5 thinking I had overslept.  I figured I'd just get up and get going.  There was no reason not to.  I checked the temp this morning and it was sitting at 25.9 degrees.  Brrr!  I've found though, that I enjoy the cold weather temps more than a 60 degree, sunny day run.

What am I wearing on these cold weather runs?  I've got on:  stretchy exercise pants, a full sports bra *covers my belly too-kind of like an undershirt*, a short sleeve shirt, a long sleeved exercise jacket, gloves, ear warmer, and my reflective vest.  I'm probably quite a sight to see.  But, at 5:20, who cares?  What is my motivation to get up so early?  Well, a couple of things.  1)  I don't have to push a 30ish pound toddler in a jogger stroller *not that I don't love taking her along, but it makes it a bit more difficult*.  2)  The above reason of not liking the warmer weather for running.

What gets me moving these days?  I've changed up my music list since last I posted.  I needed something that would keep me motivated and I keep tweaking it.  This is my list as of today:

1. Voulez-Vous--A*Teens
2. Windy--The Association
3. Marry You--Bruno Mars
4. Higher--Creed
5. Holding Out for a Hero--Bonnie Tyler
6. Invisible Touch--Genesis
7. Eye of the Tiger--Survivor
8. Be My Lover--La Bouche
9. Firework--Katy Perry *at dark o'clock, it's easy to replay this one a couple of times...I love this one right now!*
10. Boot Scootin' Boogie--Brooks & Dunn
11. Karma Chameleon--Culture Club
12. Bang Bang Bang--Christina Perri
13. Sweet Dreams--Eurythmics
14. Tainted Love--Soft Cell
15. Mamma Mia--A*Teens

I have a good pace and I'm really enjoying this right now.  I have just 3 more weeks of 10K training.  It's amazing what you can push yourself to do with the right mindset.

A huge shout out to a friend who is beginning her journey at the gym today!  Go get 'em!  I'm so proud of you!

And lastly, if you're going to indulge in Halloween candy, count it!

What a year can do!

You know, every once in a while, I whip out my trusty blue tape measure and do a few quick measurements.  I don't typically write them down, but I haven't 'written' them down since May.  In some ways, I really wish that I had written down my very beginning measurements so that I could look back and say, "Holy crap smokes!  That is a lot of inches lost!"  Alas, I did not, but I really started tracking them when I started P90X a little over a year ago.  A friend of mine let me borrow it and I did it religiously faithfully unless I was sick or was taking care of sick kiddos.

From then until now *the end of September until the end of October* I dropped 22.9 pounds and 22 inches!  When you mash it all together, it's pretty cool.  Does that mean for each inch lost it is equivalent to a pound?  It kind of looks that way.

I've completed week 10 of C210K and will begin week 11 on Saturday.  I slowed my pace a bit yesterday morning and I think my 'perfect' temperature is a balmy 41 degrees with no sun.  Meaning?  I had my reflective vest on for the darker portion of my run, until I got to the sidewalks of 'in town' and stuck to where there was plenty of street lights.  I felt amazing after my run and I feel like part of it was because I kept my pace slower.  We'll see how I do on Saturday.

On the GF journey, it's gone well this week.  I tried out the GF Bob's Red Mill Bread Mix this week and it is surprisingly very tasty.  Hubby and middle kiddo both liked it, so I guess it isn't just me.  When pricing out GF bread *pre-made* in comparison to the mix, it was nearly a couple of dollars difference *cheaper in favor of the mix*.  I'm also thinking about trying some of their GF all-purpose flour too.  I've been checking out recipes for stuffing/dressing for Thanksgiving as well as pumpkin pie recipes.  I think just about everything else that we serve is already GF.  I'm trying to be prepared.

Off to bed with me.  I'm hoping to sleep in, but I'm not going to hold my breath with two out of three kiddos who appreciate the early morning.

Nearly two years ago...

In just a few short days, I will be celebrating two years of beginning my journey to healthy.  I can't believe it to be honest.  It seems like yesterday.  It all began on October 1st, 2010.  It was the year my youngest was born.  I was tired of being behind the camera instead of in front of it.  This is where it began.  The picture in this post, is as close to where I was at when it all started.

At some point, I was able to look over my journey and see it like this.  And in this post, I talk about why I feel like a 'former fat girl'.  I think some people never really saw me as fat.  I just had a bit of extra padding tacked onto my tall frame.  I know it had started to have an effect on my internal organs and on my knees.  Let's just say age and weight were starting to catch up to me.

Then there was this post that marked the difference a year can make. 

This is me now.  I took this picture on my 35th birthday.  Yes, it's been two years, but it still isn't as easy as I'd hoped.  Losing weight and keeping it off is hard work.  It's not for the faint of heart.  I think if people say it's easy...they're full of it!

The other part of celebrating two years...I have logged my food every day for two years.  I'm sitting here looking at my notebook that has today's food stuffs listed in it.  Will I ever be able to stop logging?  Most likely not.  Do I mind?  No, not really.  It is what it is.  By writing down what I eat, I can keep myself accountable.  Without it, I'd probably start adding the pounds back on.

The journey continues.  What about yours?

Climb to Conquer Cancer

Warning:  Picture heavy!  :)

So my friend and I did this really neat thing on Saturday, August 18th.  It was called "Climb to Conquer Cancer" and it's literally a 'climb' up Snowbowl Road in Flagstaff.  She picked me up at 5:30 a.m. to be there at the start by 6:30.  I was quite surprised at how many people had already started the climb when we got there.  They completely shut down the road to 'outside' traffic.  Everyone walks on the left so that the right lane is left open for the buses that bring you back down *or emergency personnel*.  You can see that here in the first picture.  This was early on.  *I just love photo documenting some of my walks.*

It is indeed a steep climb, but we kept a pretty steady pace.  We even passed a few people.

The views were amazing.  The light green area...that's where we parked the car...waaaay down there!

The sun was coming through these aspens juuuust right.  Heaven!

These were flags in memory or in honor of those who have battled cancer.



Amazing!

Yes!  We did it!

The puffy arch was the actual finish line!

These two guys took off running right here at the end.  I just happened to catch them! :)

Sweaty, but we made it!  Such a great victory!

One last look at the mountain.  This was just before we left.

It was 7 miles up.  It was worth every step.  Would I do it again?  Absolutely!  Especially if it means we can be just two steps closer to finding a cure for cancers of every kind.  Would I have been able to do it last year?  Maybe.  But, I certainly am in much better shape this year than last.

Sometimes walking has a purpose other than being healthy.  Sometimes it's doing a 'climb' to remember.

After a week...

I've been back to counting points for a week.  My week didn't start out so great after having some of my pancakes that I normally make on Friday night *it's our breakfast for dinner night.*  I wasn't exaggerating when I said that I was over by a lot.  It wasn't 20 points, but it was at least 10 points over.  Yikes!

So, after a week of hard work *and still dipping into my weeklies...not my activity points, but my weeklies*, I'm happy to report that I was down 1.8 this week at my morning weigh-in.  When I say my weigh-in, it's just me...and the scale.  I don't have anyone standing over me.  Well...I do have my children standing in the room most often when I'm weighing myself.  They don't really count though.

I'm sad that I haven't gotten in as much walking as I was in the prior month.  It just hasn't been possible.  I can walk with my shortest of the short people, but the older two don't like being 'held up' by me if I walk *and they ride*.  And if I have them walk, there's lots of whining *yes, even from a 9 and 5 year old*.  By the time hubby gets home, it's his time to run, and so I go without.  I have walked twice this week.  We have also taken a ride twice this week, so I'm not without any exercise, just not as much as I would like.  On Monday, I'll be back into it with vigor!  The oldest two are slated to get on the bus at 7:15 *or there abouts*.  The shortest of my shorts will be in the jogger stroller ready to go when we walk them to the bus stop that morning.  We'll be hitting the street as the bus pulls away.  She loves going for walks with momma.  She was with me when I did my first 10 mile walk.  If it's a longer walk, she ends up conking out in the stroller.  We'll see how she does on Monday.  She may chat the whole way and that would be okay too.

I'm ready for a new week.  A week from tomorrow, I'll be walking with my friend up Snowbowl for the American Cancer Society.  I can't wait!  It's about 7 miles up *and I mean up*.  And believe you me, I'll be wearing my heart rate monitor to log every morsel.  School starts.  A new amount of crazy begins.  Hubby and I are preparing ourselves for what could be some difficulty with our middle kiddo on homework.  Deep breathing.  In.  Out.  In.  Out.

Are you hanging in there?  Are you tweaking as necessary?  Are you getting out and getting your move on?

*A shout out to Granny...I know you're reading...and I miss you!  I hope all is well in your small neck of the woods.  Are you hanging in there?*

A-Ha!

On Friday of this past week, I decided to start tracking my Weight Watcher points again.  I'm not really sure what made me think to start doing it, but I did.  I have been having a hard time keeping those few pounds above off *the two to three above my goal*, even with drinking my water faithfully.  It was getting frustrating.  I logged everything into MFP at the same time I was counting my points.  Now, I know there are some people out there that do GREAT with MFP.  Counting calories is totally their thing and they have lost big.

The beginning of my day looked like this:

For my purposes, my day was going great.  My middle kiddo had soccer practice and I came home to make pancakes *with fresh milled flour*.  Uh. Yum!  When I entered them into MFP, I still had calories to spare.  I was doing great until I figured out how many points those bad boys were.  Yikes!  Let's just say I was over by a lot and while I counted every morsel, it was an eye opening moment.  All of this time I have been under my calorie goal, but was I within my points allowance each day?  I'm not really sure.

I have continued to count my points the last few days and it's almost been a bit more freeing.  I have a WW calculator that I'm using that I can also change days on as well as track my points for each day.  I am writing it all down like you see above.  And really?  It's okay.  It doesn't take me much time to do it and keeps things real for me.

After taking last week off from exercise, I got up at *cough* 5:15 to go for my walk this morning.  Of course, because I didn't lay everything out last night before getting up, I had difficulty finding everything I needed to get out the door.  I took my 'short' walk.  I say 'short' because people laugh at me when I say my 'short' walk is 3.25 miles.  That's not short for them.  Eh, it works for me.

As I'm typing this, I'm wondering how many activity points I got for this morning's walk.  I found this neat website.  Not only does it have an AP calculator, but if you look in the left-hand 'tool bar', they also have restaurant points, a food points calculator, and a points plus allowance calculator.  A-mazing!  I wonder if WW is allowing them to have these things on their site?  At this point, who knows?  But, it is benefiting me at this point in my life.

This post isn't to say that one can't lose by counting calories, because it is completely doable.  I'm just saying that something just wasn't working for me.  Today is my 5th day of being back to counting my points and I feel great!  Yay!

Keep plugging away friends!  The journey is never over, it just keeps improving!

Another Review

So here we are, in May and we are so close to being half way through the year.  Can you believe that 2012 is nearly half over?  I'm not really sure I can believe it.  If you've been following me for a while, you'll know that I wrote 12 for '12...that is 12 goals for 2012.  You can find my original post on that here.  You can also see my first review of my goals here.

I'm going to re-list my goals...again.

1. Get to my goal weight *185* or less and maintain it.  **I have accomplished this!  I made goal on 2/24 and I have been within 2 pounds of my goal ever since.**
2. Continue to work hard by strengthening my body.  **This is daily.  My legs are sure getting a work out quite frequently now that we're riding a lot more.**
3. Try to have at least one 'date' with my hubby per month *coffee date, dinner date, something!*   **This will probably get put on the back burner during the summer.  Hubby's schedule is SO busy as it our family schedule.**
4. Keep trying new recipes.  **We are still doing this frequently.  Our newest favorite is oven fried chicken.  Yum!**
5. Read more.   **I read 3 books in April and started a 4th, so I'd say I'm doing fairly well with this goal!**
6. Take time for myself (outside of exercise & my book study)  **I'm still doing this regularly.  My new favorite is taking a bubble bath.**
7. Continue to blog and share my journey with others.  **My posts are a little further apart, but I'm still working on this.**
8. Do things with the girls that require going outside and being active.  **We're doing a lot of this.  We've done a lot of bike riding and just playing outside.**
9. Eat fresh fruits/veggies as much as possible.  **We are still getting our Bountiful Basket and loving it!  We just had fresh summer squash last night with our fish fillets.  It was heavenly!**
10. Write more letters by hand.  **I have been doing much better with this.  No one knows just how much a hand written note means to people.  It's a true blessing!**
11. Laugh more.  **Since I went home for a week, I've been doing this a bit more.  I'm not feeling as overwhelmed as I was before.**
12. Learn how to better express my feelings to others.  **A work in progress.  That's all I have to say about that.**

I believe that it is healthy to reflect on your goals...and often.  I think it helps you to see where you were, where you've been, and how far you've come.

Be sure to pull your goals out from time to time.  If you need to dust them off, then do it.  They might even refresh your vigor.  Just because the year is nearly half over, doesn't mean you can't get moving on some of those goals.  It's never too late to get started on them.  Now is the time!

Problems with weight loss...

Weight and being over weight is such a huge sensitive issue for so many people.  I just wanted to let everyone know that it is so individual to each person.  There are so many reasons why people struggle with weight.  Reasons can include:  a medical reason *a thyroid disorder, diabetes, or something else*, their budget is tight, or any other number of reasons someone can come up with.

My reasons for being overweight include:  laziness, a tight budget, allowing far too many treats, knowing that my hubby loves me regardless of size, and being 'comfortable' in my ways.

My reasons for losing the weight include, but are not limited to:  wanting to be healthy for myself and  family, wanting to be in pictures with my kids instead of always being behind the camera, not wanting to be out of breath when I chase after my children, setting a healthy example for my children, staying away from the diabetic diagnosis for a while longer *since it is so prevalent in my family history it's still a possibility*, knowing that I was unhappy in my own skin, and feeling like I am desirable to my hubby.

Why am I posting about this?  I can give advice, I can be the best cheerleader, I can blog helpful tips, and share my journey, but really, weight loss is individual.  My food choices may not be your food choices.  That's okay.  My methods may not be your methods, and that's okay too.  Sadly, I can't lose the weight for you, and no offense, wouldn't want to lose it for you either.  I think when you have a long way to go, the journey is what gives you strength.  The only one that can lose your weight is you.

If you're not happy where you're at, maybe it's time to make those thoughts of "I think I might be able to do it" and change them into a solid, "I'm going to do it...no excuses!"  Can your reasons for losing weight outweigh your reasons for being overweight?  If they can, then get moving...NO EXCUSES!

Feeling more like me!

This past week, my beloved hubby cut me loose to visit my family for a week...alone.  And when I say alone, I mean alone.  By myself.  Sans children.  Me, myself and I.  Yes, he stayed home for a week, also alone, with all 3 girls and played daddy.  No he didn't 'babysit'...he played daddy for 24/7.  I had to laugh daily at his status, "It is now noon on day X of 7 being a single dad. All three kids are still alive!"  Ha!  He did fine.

My time away was busy, but good.  We celebrated my mom's 60th birthday the day after I arrived.  That night, we took my grandmother to the ER where I insisted that they do something more for her.  Don't mess with an angry redhead!  I went to breakfast to see a dear friend of mine that morning, and she said, "Why aren't you allowing yourself to enjoy your vacation?"  *Or something along those lines.*  I would love nothing more than to let loose for a week and not care about what I eat, but unfortunately, it takes a lot for me to get back on track.  So, I just don't even entertain that thought.  I also exercised while I was home.  I took my Slim in 6 and my band with me. 

The rest of the week was filled with seeing who I could in a limited time.  I feel like I should be alone for several weeks in order to fit everyone in.  Hubby's grandma was surprised to see me.  I spent time with my mother-in-law as well.  As usual, it seemed too short.  For a brief moment, I thought about staying a bit longer to help with my grandmother since she's still in severe pain.  She goes in for an MRI on Wednesday.

While home, I had some pictures taken by a friend.  I did them in part as a celebration for getting to goal, and in part, for my sweet hubby.  You can snag a glimpse by looking at my profile picture.  You can also see my friend's work here.

After a week, I feel more like myself.  And wow!  Ten days without riding my bike and I felt like a wimp this morning.  Sheesh! 

So where are you at?  Are you staying the course, even if it's hard?